What's Around the Corner?

There has been an idea on my mind lately that applies solely to dating. The idea is that of marriage, and how we decide who we are going to marry. More in-depth it's really about why there are so many singles here in Mormon-land. Let's take the city of Walla Walla, Washington for example. Single's are able to grow up/ move here and find eternal happiness with a significant other. This town is tiny compared to the area of the Salt Lake Valley and Utah County Valley, and yet, I bet that their marriage % in the Singles BRANCH is higher than the % in my ward. Yes they are a branch, yes they are tiny, and yes, they manage to find an eternal companion. The reason for this example, you may be wondering by now, is to enter into your mind this question: Do I put off dating and marriage because I expect something better to be around the corner?


We live in an area where there are a lot of options in people to date. There is a never ending supply of Single Adults and within that community there are all different types, sizes, colors, personalities, careers, eductions, activity status, etc, to choose from. But really, how hard is it to find one person, just one, that you enjoy talking to? That you enjoy hanging out with? That you feel you have something in common with? That wants the same things out of life that you do? I argue that it really isn't that difficult to find someone that meets that criteria. As I was sitting in Sacrament meeting today I started thinking about past relationships, past interests & current interests and really thought, of those guys was there ONE that I could have married? The answer is yes. I could have probably married all of them and been happy. Yes, there are some that I may have been happier with than others, but I still would have been happy.


Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that you should settle for just anyone that goes to church on Sunday and is Temple worthy. I'm saying that maybe it's time that we adjust our thinking of the "perfect significant other" and understand that what's around the corner isn't always better, it isn't always right, but yes, it will still always be there. There is a never ending path of corners in our life, but here's a suggestion, start walking on the path with someone, you might stop noticing the corners and what's around them and you might start walking in a straight line, hand in hand with your eternal companion. Yes, you may walk a little ways, hand in hand, and realize that that hand is not the one that you should be holding for eternity, and that's okay. (It's called dating.) Gently release that hand and find another one to hold, but please, stop wondering what's coming up around the corner and start enjoying the company of those walking the path with your right now.

Flowers & Chocolate

I was talking to my Nephew who just started school at BYU the other night and the topic of boys and girls came up. Somehow flowers and chocolates came up too...hmmm....shocker?! I think not :) Anyways, I know that sometimes you boys think that flowers and chocolates are cliche' and to tell you the truth, they kind of are, but I want to throw this out there...they are still important. Or at least the concept of flowers and chocolates are important. Girls want to feel special. We want to feel like you did something for us that is different than what you do for all the other girls in your life. Show us that romance is alive. Show us that we're worth the extra effort. Just don't tell us to keep it between the two of us. That just makes us wonder why you don't want people to know about it. For example, I had a guy send me flowers at work and in the note ask me to keep it between the two of us. That just put me in an awkward situation. I had to lie to everyone at my office about who the flowers were from and it made me wonder who else he had sent flowers to in our office! FOR REAL?!?! Don't do that, don't take what should be a wonderful, give us butterflies, make us blush gesture and turn it into something shady and overused.



Of course it doesn't have to be flowers and chocolate. It's not about flower and chocolate, it's about romance and chivalry. So if you're dating a girl that like motorcycles and guns, plan a date where you pick her up on a motorcycle and take her to the shooting range. Maybe she's more into football or basketball...then send her a t-shirt from her favorite team. Maybe you see something in the news that makes you think of her or worry about her, then send her a text message! I had a guy do that just the other day and it just made me feel special. I loved it! So it's really about those little somethings that make us feel unique, that reminds us that you're thinking of us. Take a couple of minutes, think about things you can do, write them down and then do them! Good luck boys!

Huh???

The other day I was visiting with some friends while our Bishop entertained us with stories of how he and his wife started dating. He commented that usually if a girl had a lot of interest from other guys he would bail, but that he had made the decision that he was going to get married that year and so none of that mattered anymore. He had a goal in mind and he was going to do everything to meet that goal. This came as a revelation to us girls standing there listening to our Bishop. You see we had always been told that guys liked girls that seemed to be in high demand, that there was competition for. What our Bishop was saying, and what the guys standing there were agreeing with, is that guys actually don't like the idea of competition and will walk away if there are other guys there vying for a girl's attention. SAY WHAT?! Yeah, pretty big information for us girls! So I'm putting it out there to you boys that may actually be reading this....which do you prefer? I can understand not wanting to fight for a girl's attention, but if there aren't any guys hanging around does that make you shy away as well? Which one is better for us girls to do...hang out with boys or don't? Please, please, please explain yourselves!